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I can talk about porn here, right?

Of course I can. It’s my Tumblr account, after all. I don’t suppose it really matters what I talk about since I only have a few followers and the likelihood of anyone even reading it is pretty slim.

But since I avoid anything remotely pornographic on my product review blog, I can’t talk about Matinee over there, and it’s the first adult film that has truly impressed me. Not so much because the sex is uber hot, but because the acting is actually decent. Supposedly these are real actors, not porn stars. That means realistic sex, not some performance-based, shag marathon with the all requisite extreme sexual stunts typically found in porn scenes these days. This sex is vanilla sensual and realistic, possibly even romantic, depending on the viewer. I really don’t even want to classify this film as a porno. It’s only around a half-hour long (a good length for product testing sessions) and just contains the one scene. Produced by Blue Artichoke, Matinee is more chick-flick erotica than porn.

Granted, the plot is pretty contrived, but it’s centered on the two leading actors in a theatrical production. Their play gets some bad reviews criticizing the lack of chemistry between the characters during the love scene. Understanding that the scene needs work and knowing that a talent scout will be in the audience during the matinee performance, the leading man suggests that they improvise it. They get a bit carried away and end up shagging for real during the play. 

While I’m totally down with how the sex scene was done, I don’t really get a sense that the actors are secretly hot for each other. Also, her handing him a condom—as much as I’m all for safer sex and the use of them—kind of ruined the illusion that this was spur of the moment and spontaneous. Still, I totally enjoyed this film, way more than any other adult movie I’ve watched. I think it’s awesome.

I’m really not in the habit of buying porn and only have a few titles. Occasionally, will offer up DVDs to their affiliates without requiring a review. That’s how I scored Matinee, as well as an instructional DVD on fellatio and The Curse of MacBeth. I’m a Shakespeare nut and was really interested in seeing what the adult film industry could do with MacBeth, so I requested it without even thinking to read the description. It’s definitely the most edgy title I have. I’m sure there are way more extreme films out there, but this one is pretty hard core.

The others I have are standard plot-based porn flicks, with the usual seven (or so) scenes: Fade to Black, Looking In, and Hot Blooded. I didn’t like Fade to Black. I made several attempts to watch it, and each time I got fed up and put a different DVD on. The chick makes an awful high-pitched noise that grates on my nerves, and I didn’t think the sex was all that hot. Plus, it’s a porno about making porn. I get it—all Paul Thomas had to do was get in a second camera crew to stand behind him for a few days, and there’s enough footage for another movie. Looking In was quite good, and I reviewed it on some time ago.

Hot Blooded probably isn’t even available anymore. It was the first porn DVD I bought, dirt-cheap on clearance. Ron Jeremy is in a scene, and I’ll be honest here and admit that I wanted to get a look at his legendary dick. That was my main reason for buying it, but it turned out to be pretty good. There is a masturbation scene, threesome (FFM), a girl-on-girl, and four scenes of shagging couples. This one was filmed in the mid-eighties, so be prepared to see some prolific pubes. Angel, Harry Reems and Kay Parker are also in this title, and the Hitachi Magic Wand makes a few appearances.

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